Confidence joins Humility

Finding Your Way to the Messy Middle

I notice that there seem to be two extremes of where we might find ourselves with regard to pursuing our desires or aspirations. One is a place of thinking we are not competent, worthy, or perfect enough. The other is thinking everything is possible, that we are unlimited and capable of doing anything, that we know it all. I tend to call this one strutting puffy-chest and the other timid tiptoer.

Life goes along and the timid tiptoers discover competence, courage and confidence as they produce results with their gifts and talents. They stop hiding from themselves and our world. They bravely walk into the messy middle, knowing they’ll make mistakes, but that they aren’t totally incapable or incompetent. Love and passion begin to lead the way.

At the other extreme, the strutting puffy chest ones bump up against areas where they really don’t know what they are doing. They begin having doubts, fears, and insecurities about their “knowing it all.” Maybe they even take a steep fall. Their confidence becomes imbued with humility, curiosity, and a willingness to seek other truths and possibilities.

Both paths lead to this messy middle of perfectly imperfect, leading with love or softening with humility, a willingness to be wrong, make mistakes, and to keep going for our dreams. When confidence dances with the vulnerability of falls and failings, we can be heard, lifted, trusted, and hopefully respected rather than feared or invisible. We can show up in the real place of ordinary people achieving extraordinary results for our lives and being of service to others.

I now know I have been these characters in my own journey and discover vitality and creativity in the messy middle. I know life events and experiences will ground me anytime I get all puffy chested and I also know that I can lift myself up, often with the support and belief of others, and create amazing results and learn from the slips and miscues, and wrongheadedness. I invite you to join me, if you aren’t already there, in the mud puddles of life and be certain to bring your dancing boots! It’s like divine choreography of doing the hilarious hustle or the graceful waltz on the side of a mountain. It’s where freedom and feeling fully alive lives and breathes.

Have you found your way to the messy middle place? How did you get there?